Writers' Editing Workshop » writing

On the tolerance of writers

admin — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 19:43:53 +0000

I am not a big fan of diatribes against editors. But I can definitely see the point when I read something like this bit from this month’s Chicago Manual Q&A.

Q. In the sentence “I thought more people would be interested in knowing what happened to XXX, but I see that his fate, his life, doesn’t seem to bring folks together the way the water did,” would you use “don’t” instead of “doesn’t”? Or does that comma after “his life” keep the verb singular? The author will not tolerate the insertion of “and” between “his life” and “his fate.”

Good for the author!

Admittedly, it can be hard when your editor works for a publisher. But often, even when you’ve hired an editor yourself, it can be hard to remember: the editor is supposed to make your life easier, not harder. Our job is to provide you with new ideas, new information that will help you create exactly what you want to create.

If I’m doing my job, responses to an edit I suggest (yes, suggest) will be like these:

Thanks! I was having trouble describing that.
I can see where my original was unclear, but this doesn’t quite work either. How about… ? and occasionally…
That doesn’t work. I’m keeping it the way it was.

What I really love is how the writer and I almost always come to agreement on each change, because we’re both working toward the same goal: helping the writer’s ideas come through. I question them, they question me, and we both learn things.

If you have an editor who thinks their ideas are more important than yours, or doesn’t want you to challenge their edits, run!

In case you’re curious, here’s the answer the terrific Chicago editors gave.

A. “Doesn’t” is correct, and “and” would change the meaning of the sentence. “Life” here is a gloss on “fate,” a parenthetical explanation or extension of it, not an additional item. Your author is right—but you have left us hanging about the curiously unifying properties of this water.

Talking and Writing, Plain and Clear

admin — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 15:20:26 +0000

“Plain language” is a movement away from legalese, and toward clear language that people can understand. It turns out that contracts and laws don’t have to be written in gobbledygook afterall.

My friend Cheryl Stephens has been a pioneer in the plain language movement. She’s on a blog tour this week, promoting her book, Plain Language Legal Writing.

I had the opportunity to ask her a question, so I gave it some thought. I’m a big fan of plain language — I think of myself as a plain language editor — but there’s one question I’ve been asked that’s been really hard to answer. So I picked that one to ask her. And apparently it was a good choice!

Q. “You tell me to write naturally, the way I would speak, but the truth is that I even talk this way — what you call “stuffy.” I have to struggle to avoid using complex sentences and big words, even when speaking. Does plain language apply to speech, and if so, can you suggest a manner in which I could revise my speaking to be more in keeping with plain language ideas?”

Guest answer, from Cheryl Stephens:
Plain language in oral discourse encompasses many of the plain language principles used in written communication, with added emphasis on the importance of considering your audience. Additional concerns are how people listen and process information and techniques you can use to be sure the message you intend to communicate is the one being communicated.

Short sentences.

Start with a human subject.
I will, You do, He went, The doctor will…

Use transition words and signal words, creating a word map.
“There are 2 things to remember. First, … Second, …so that’s 2 things to do, then.”

3/7/15 rules.
* Don’t use more than 3 examples or 3 items in a list. Break a longer list down to groups of 3 items.
* Wait through 7 seconds of silence for a response so the listener can process your information and develop a reply.
* While you won’t count your words as you speak, in oral presentations, a short sentence is less than 15 words.

Watch your pronouns.
Avoid using too many 3rd person pronouns (“He was her worst enemy.”). Listeners get lost trying to keep track of who you mean. Restate the original noun. Use personal pronouns to speak directly to the listener. “You are ……”

Be positive.
Beware of negative prefixes that get lost in the process of speech or hearing: illegitimate, impossible, unlikely and so on. This is a particularly important consideration if your listeners have English as a second language.

I discuss these and other tips on my website at CherylStephens.com.

Thanks for that, Cheryl! I think paying attention to plain language in speech is an important part of learning to write in plain language. And learning to write in plain language is vital to learning to write well.

I’m going to start doing a Q. and A. as a regular feature here, though I’ll usually answer the questions myself. Send me your questions, and I’ll answer as many as I can.

Avoid cliché in your writing

testuser — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 21:25:09 +0000

Writers who defend their clichés on the grounds that "they wouldn’t have become clichés if they weren’t good" may have a terrific point. And they should enjoy that, because what they won’t have is successful writing.

A cliché is a word or phrase that’s been overused. It may have been a clever phrase when it was new, but readers are tired of it now. Reading it is boring. (I hope you got that. I said "boring." That word should terrify you. If it doesn’t, well, maybe you should consider a new career.)

Cliché is a crutch that lets the writer use an acceptable one-size-fits all description, instead of crafting the perfect description for the circumstances.
A cliché makes for uninteresting reading. The reader already knows what "flat as a pancake" looks like. It doesn’t invite her to create a new mental image.
The best writing is a rich interaction between the writer’s mind and the reader’s. Using cliché is a lazy way of writing that encourages a lazy way of reading, making it very difficult for the reader and the writer to connect.

Clichés to avoid

icing on the cake * bright and shining * all for the best
play favorites * give it a rest * just deserts
better late than never * too tired to sleep * play with fire
diamond in the rough * wet behind the ears * short and sweet
live dangerously * point of no return

When cliché is a good idea

There are a few good uses for cliché.

Twisted Cliché

Irony should be used carefully, because the technique itself is becoming cliché. But if you can pull it off, the rare twisted cliché can be fun. “What a great birthday! The tickets to Hawaii were just icing on the bright red Porche.” (I didn’t say I could pull it off!)

I used to get a kick out of my dad saying “Never put off to tomorrow what you can put off indefinitely.” Isn’t he clever?

Revealing a Character

Fortunately, your characters don’t have to be as good at putting together words as you are. If Mama has been telling Henry not to go out with his friends, you might quote her as saying, “Mark my words, boy. You go up there tonight, you gonna get caught red-handed!”

Cliché used in this way lets the reader know who Mama is. We learn not only that she doesn’t want him to go, but we learn how she talks to him, and we begin to learn something about their relationship.

Because cliché doesn’t have the impact of more creative word-crafting, it’s likely that Henry isn’t going to be very strongly affected by her words. But rather than have Mama talk to the boy without using cliché, and possibly really reach him, here I want to show the reader a character who uses cliché easily, and to show the consequences of that sort of interaction. In fact, as I’ve been sitting here making up this interaction, I’ve discovered that Henry feels that his Mama never listens to him, and he ignores what she says because it’s so vague he can’t even argue with it. (Dang. I hate it when throw-away characters come to life, and I have to save them in a drawer.)

Cliché Hunting

Those two uses of cliché are usually ok. But the rest you have to fix. Here’s how:
- Practice listening for cliché as you go through your day. Any phrase that could be taken from one scene and dropped into an entirely different one and work fine should get your attention.
- Read your work out loud so that clichés you miss will catch your attention.
- Visualize your scene clearly, so that you won’t be as tempted to use the first phrase that comes to mind to describe it.
Now you know another trick for making your writing sparkle! If you have questions, send me an email. I’ll answer as best I can.

(Psst! How many clichés did you find in this article?)

How to outline a novel

admin — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 20:38:06 +0000

Outlining is not just for non-fiction.

Should you outline your novel? For some writers, the idea of an outline feels stifling, like it will suck their creativity away. But an outline is really just a map of the novel — a way to see the big picture. A good outline shouldn’t feel constricting. It should flow and change with your writing.

An editor — or a writer in the editing stages — needs to be able to envision the whole work at once. An outline, even a casual one, can help. And it can prevent your spending thousands of dollars for editor’s comments like “I thought this character was in China? How come now she’s on the beach?” Or, “He found his lost ring in chapter 8, but he doesn’t lose it until chapter 10.” Or even, “You’ve dropped hints about… but you forgot to resolve it.”

You don’t have to impress anybody.

It’s your novel, and it’s your outline. You don’t have to impress your 7th grade English teacher. Write it your way.

If the idea of outlining your novel scares you, try thinking of it differently. Just making a list of your chapters and describing what happens in each one will help you to keep things in order, and make your editor’s job a lot easier.

Include things like which characters do what, and what external events occur.

House burns down. Celia meets George as he’s fighting the fire.
George acts weird on their date.
Bill, George’s roommate, finds the letter…

Later, you can change the outline to reflect decisions you make about the flow of the story. You can add or delete chapters at will. Because you know what? It’s your outline.

If you decide you want to go all the way, outline your novel completely. Some writers come up with twenty or thirty pages of outline before they even start writing.

Outlining a finished novel

Even if your novel is done, writing an outline can help in several ways.

It can make an editor’s job easier, and therefore cheaper.
It will help you when it’s time to write a synopsis for potential publishers.
An outline-after-the-fact will help you take an honest look, and determine if there are problems you should fix.

Writing Non-Fiction: Write an Outline

admin — Tue, 13 May 2008 16:56:47 +0000

Clean, Effective Articles and Exposition

At the coffee shop where I like to work in the mornings, you can get whatever you want for breakfast, as long as it’s either a scramble, or an omelet. I tease them, “Can I choose which one?” See, in my house, you ask for an omelet, and you might get an omelet, or, if things aren’t going as well, you might get a scramble. Same eggs and cream, same veggies and cheese, but in the end, an entirely different shape.

A Scramble or an Omelet?

The difference between me, at home on my iron skillet, and the chef with his professional equipment, is two-fold. First, he has an expensive non-stick skillet, just perfect for making omelets. Second, he has practiced using that skillet, until his method is almost fool-proof.

How to Outline: Writing the Perfect Omelet

A shiny new skillet won’t help you. For expository writing, you need a different sort of tool: the outline.

Don’t panic, now. This isn’t eighth grade, and you don’t have to use roman numerals. That’s not the point of an outline anyway.

An outline helps you clarify your thinking, and figure out exactly what you want to cover in your article. It will give your final article a logical structure and flow, making it much easier for the reader to follow. And it will improve the editing and re-write process, because you can see relationships between sections clearly, and move things around when necessary.

How to Create an Outline

Creating the outline is all about organizing your thoughts. Once that’s done, writing it down is a simple matter. So, to get your thinking in order, start by answering these questions:

Who is the intended audience for this article?
Why am I writing it? What’s my purpose?
In a sentence or so, what is it I want to say? (This is your thesis statement.)

Once you have clarified for yourself why you are writing, who you are writing for, and what you have to say, you can begin putting the ideas in order.

All pets must be spayed or neutered.
1. There are a lot of kittens born every year.
2. Almost all are unwanted.
3.Feral cats spread disease…

Write your thesis statement at the top of a page. Then, below that, make a list of points you want to be sure to cover. You do not need to be specific yet.

Now spend some time adding details. (Kittens born where? In the world? In Chicago?) You might want to research facts that you haven’t checked out yet. (How many kittens, exactly?) You can note areas where you’d like to include a quote from an expert, or a graph. If you are using a word-processor like Word or OpenOffice.org, you will find it easy to move things around, and add more information to each section as you think it through. (Learning to use the outline feature of your word-processor will pay off in the long run. But I’ll leave that for another article.)

As you add the details, the logical structure will take shape. You’ll notice areas where you want to talk about a particular facet of your topic, but haven’t given the background information yet. It’s very straightforward, at that point, to slide things around until the flow makes sense.

An outline can really make a difference in how your article comes together, and how much stress you experience while writing it. It will also improve the reaction you get from editors and potential publishers. Clear logic, distinctive sections, and complete thought processes make your article more inviting and more readable, for everyone from the editor and publisher to the reader who finds it and decides to dive in to see what you have to say.